Handle Your Business: What Not to Wear

I write because I love.    I must do this for your own good. 

From time to time, I am going to give you the benefit of my wisdom — life lessons sometimes learned the hard way (from my own f-ups) and sometimes learned the easy way (from someone else’s f-ups).   

It’s just my way of helping you handle your business. 

Ladies, ladies, ladies.  This post is dedicated to you. 

I hear that some of you are having trouble selecting the most appropriate outfits for job interviews (and for the workplace in general).

The interview is not the time to bring sexy back.   I heard this story recently:  A woman arrived for a job interview wearing a red cocktail dress despite having been told by the employment agency that sent her that a suit would be more appropriate.   She ignored the agency’s recommendation because the red number was her “lucky dress”. 

Girlfriend, you’re looking for a job, not looking to get laid.

Of course, as luck would have it, she did not get the job.

Other No-no’s and Hell No’s

Stay away from low cut, cleavage revealing outfits.  This word of advice is especially for my breastically gifted sisters.   But my fellow mammary challenged sisters,  just because you can’t provide nourishment to a gnat doesn’t mean that you can unbutton your shirt down to your navel.  Been there.  Done that.  Trust me, it’s not a good look.

Don’t wear anything too tight as to give you a yeast infection or too short as to cause you to catch a cold.  Hemlines should fall slightly above the knee at their highest.   When you sit down (make sure that you can sit down),  skirts/dresses shouldn’t “rise up”, as the old folks would say, turning your interview into an ob-gyn exam.

No hooker heels please.  Shoes should be black, brown, grey or navy.  The bright red shoes with the gold chain are best for work on the pole…the stripper pole. 

No large dangling earrings.  Save the door knockers and the big hoops for the club.

As for makeup, personally, I don’t wear anything other than lipstick.  If you choose to wear makeup, remember it’s not the time to get in touch with your inner drag queen. Dispense with the 2-inch thick foundation and false eyelashes. 

My black and brown sistahs come close…closer…closer still….Hear what I have to tell you.  Your nails…can be a bit too much.   Cut the long talons and skip the designs.  Nothing screams, “Shanehneh”  and “Do you want fries with that shake?” like red nails with sparkling tips.

Finally, your hair.  Touchy subject, I know — at least for me anyway.  Personally, my hair is just to the right of being a hot mess.  It’s “natural”.  That’s negro-gal talk for non-relaxed, non-weaved, non-wigged hair.  My hairstyle is not a political statement or an aesthetic choice.  The bottom line is that I hate hair salons.   Ouch…I just had a scalp burn flashback.

Whatever you decide, keep it simple, neat and clean.  I rely on a headband to tame my locks.  As for you, I highly recommend that you stay away from sculptured styles and crayon-like colors.   Remember, it’s a job interview, not a hair show.   And forget about the lioness-like weaved (or natural) mane.  It works for Beyonce but you’re not Beyonce. 

 Well, this bit of advice should provide you with a solid foundation on which to build your power look.

Now, go girl and get that job.  Make that money. 

One thought on “Handle Your Business: What Not to Wear

  1. very funny. if i may add, i read somewhere that a little hint of perfume goes a long way in impressing the interviewer. that’s a little hint.

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