Giving Thanks for All The Haters

Yes, this blessed Thanksgiving, between bites of turkey, mounds of mac and cheese and bowls of sweet potatoes, I am going to turn my face towards the heavens and give thanks for all the haters.Yes, the haters, those very people who believe haterade, their most potent vitriol, is best served cold.

Yes, the haters, the often maligned and misunderstood group. I like, comedian Katt Williams, believe that haters serve an important function in society — to assure us that we are on top of our game. Why else would they be hating?’

From the HBO special and the DVD, The Pimp Chronicles, Part I, here’s Williams on haters:

“You need haters. What the **** is you complaining about? What the **** do you think a haters job is? To ****ing hate. So let them mother****er do their goddamn job…Ladies if you got 14 women hating on you, you need to figure out how the **** to get to 16 before the summer get here…Fellas if you got 20 haters, you need 40 of them mother****ers…If there’s any haters in here right now that don’t have nobody to hate on, feel free to hate on me.”

I’m going to lift my cup full of egg nog, a give a toast to the haters Thank you for giving me direction and purpose and for making me more determined not only to meet but to exceed my goals — not for your satisfaction but for my own.

So for Christmas, I don’t want a new dress, a warm coat or even the latest I-pod. I have no use for them. I want Santa to stuff my proverbial stocking full of haters — color and size unimportant. And with my stocking full of haters, I know it’s not only going to be a Merry Christmas but a damn great New Year.

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